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No ke aha mākou e hoʻoilina ai i ka poʻe i hōʻeha iā mākou?
ʻike manaʻo
ʻO ko mākou wā kamaliʻi kahi mea e hoʻoholo ai i ke ʻano o ka wā makua a mākou e hana ai a mālama i kā mākou pilina
Ua ʻōlelo ʻia ʻo ka piliwaiwai ka addiction o ke kenekulia XNUMX. E like me kēia, ka mea i hana pinepine i nā poʻomanaʻo, ke kamaʻilio mau nei mākou e pili ana i nā mea hilinaʻi ʻē aʻe e noho nei i nā māwae o ke kaiāulu: ka waiʻona, nā lāʻau lapaʻau a i ʻole ka wahine. Akā, aia kekahi mea hoʻohui ʻē aʻe e noho pū ana me mākou a pau i nā manawa he nui a mākou e haʻalele nei; ka hilinaʻi kanaka, ka pono a mākou e hana ai a manaʻo i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe.
ʻO ka pilina kanaka ke kia o ko mākou ola, akā i nā manawa he nui mākou i komo ai pairing toxic, aloha, ʻohana a i ʻole hoaloha, ka mea e kāohi iā mākou ma ke ʻano he poʻe a ʻaʻole e ʻae iā mākou e ulu a hauʻoli paha.
ʻO kēia ka mea i puka ai ʻo Manuel Hernández Pacheco, i ka Biology and Psychology mai ke Kulanui o Malaga a me ka mea kākau o ka puke "No ke aha lā ka poʻe aʻu i aloha ai e hōʻeha iaʻu?" Wehewehe ia. "ʻO ka hilinaʻi o ka naʻau e like me ke ʻano o ka piliwaiwai, i ka manawa a I Manaʻo wau i ka uku me kahi kanaka, i kekahi manawa ua hana maikaʻi ʻo ia iaʻu a i ʻole ua aloha iaʻu, e hoʻopili wau i kēlā manaʻo », wehewehe ka ʻoihana. Piʻi ka pilikia i ka wā e hoʻomaka ai kēlā kanaka a mākou e "hilinaʻi" e hōʻeha iā mākou. ʻElua kumu kēia; Ma kekahiʻaoʻao, aia kahi aʻo i loaʻa i ka wā kamaliʻi a ke manaʻo nei e hana hou ʻia; ma kahi ʻē aʻe, ʻoiai aia i kekahi manawa ke ʻano o ka uku, lilo nā kānaka i mea hoʻohui i kēlā pono. E like me ka poʻe puhi, a i ʻole ka poʻe piliwaiwai: inā i kekahi manawa ua hauʻoli lākou i kēlā, ʻaʻole hiki iā lākou ke hoʻōki i ka hana ʻana, "wahi a Manuel Hernández.
“Nā ʻeha o ka wā i hala”
A he aha ke aʻo ʻana i kamaʻilio ʻia e ka ʻoihana? ʻO lākou nā kumu o ko mākou mau manaʻo, ko mākou ʻano, i hoʻokumu ʻia i ka wā makahiki mua o ko kakou ola ana, i ko makou wa liilii. Hiki mai ka pilikia inā ʻaʻole i loaʻa iā mākou kahi hoʻomohala "maʻamau" a lawe pū mākou me mākou "nā ʻeha mai ka wā i hala."
"80% o nā mea a mākou e ʻike ai i ko mākou ola āpau a mākou e aʻo ai i nā makahiki ʻehā a ʻelima paha," wahi a ka loea a hoʻomau: "Ke loaʻa iaʻu kahi hoʻoikaika naʻau ma muli o kekahi mea e hiki mai iaʻu, e loaʻa koʻu lolo. huki hoʻomanaʻoA laila, inā koi mau koʻu makuakāne iaʻu, i koʻu noho ʻana me kahi haku, e koi nui ʻo ia iaʻu.
A laila, hoʻololi i ka mokulele o ka pilina, inā ua pilikia ke keiki i ka mea i kapa ʻia he "trauma pili"No ka mea, i ko mākou wā liʻiliʻi, ua haʻalele ko mākou mau mākua iā mākou i ko mākou ʻimi ʻana i ka nānā ʻana, ua hana ʻia kēia ʻeha, "e pale i ka ulu ʻana, kahi ulu kūlohelohe i loko o ka lolo o ke keiki, e hana ʻia ana. nā hopena no ke koena o kona ola ”, e like me ka wehewehe ʻana o ka psychologist.
E hana hou me ka makemake ole
ʻO kekahi pilikia ʻē aʻe i hoʻokomo ʻia ka poʻe i loko o kahi pilina pili ʻawaʻawa ʻo ia ka mea i kapa ʻia ʻo ka hoʻomanaʻo hoʻomanaʻo. "Makemake ka lolo e hana hou i nā protocols e mālama i ka ikehu, no laila, i ka psychogenealogy, ke hana ka lolo i kekahi mea i nā manawa he nui, hiki mai kahi manawa ʻAʻole ʻo ia i ʻike pehea e hana ai i kekahi ala ʻē aʻe», wehewehe ʻo Manuel Hernández. "I ka hopena, hoʻohui mākou i ke ʻano o kā mākou mālama ʻana iā mākou iho, akā he mea pono ia i ka manawa hoʻokahi a hiki i kēia manawa ke pōʻino," wahi āna.
Eia kekahi, ʻo kēia mau aʻa i loaʻa iā mākou mai ka wā kamaliʻi mai, ʻo ia mau loina a me nā ʻano o ka hana, e hoʻokokoke aku iā mākou i kēia mau pilina ʻona. "Inā i ko mākou wā liʻiliʻi ua manaʻo mākou he hemahema mākou, he mea ia manaʻo mākou na mākou ka hewa, no laila, loaʻa iā mākou ka mana ma luna o ia ", wehewehe ʻo Manuel Hernández a hoʻomau: "ʻO ia ke kumu i hahau ai ka poʻe he nui iā lākou iho a kau pū me nā mea ʻawaʻawa, no ka mea, manaʻo lākou ʻaʻole pono lākou, no ka mea, ʻo ia wale nō ke ala a lākou i ʻike ai. hiki ke ola.
Kākoʻo ma kekahi
Inā hoʻokomo ʻia ke kanaka i loko o kahi pilina ʻawaʻawa, kahi i "hōʻeha ka mea āna i aloha ai iā ia", pono ʻo ia e hoʻoponopono iā ia iho i mea e lanakila ai. Akā, he hana koʻikoʻi kēia no nā poʻe he nui. "ʻO ka nui o ka makaʻu i ka wā kamaliʻi, ʻoi aku ka paʻakikī o ke aʻo ʻana, ʻoi aku ka paʻakikī o ka hoʻololi ʻana," wahi a Manuel Hernández.
"Inā he hilinaʻi, ma luna o ke kanaka a i ʻole kekahi mea, ʻo ka mea e koi ai iā mākou e hoʻoponopono iā mākou iho, e hala i kēlā withdrawal syndrome, akā ʻaʻole i hana ʻia i hoʻokahi lā. hele liilii mai», Wehewehe i ka 'oihana. No ka hoʻokō ʻana i kēia hoʻoponopono, ʻo ka mea nui ka hilinaʻi maʻamau i kahi kanaka ʻē aʻe, ʻaʻole ʻo nā ʻoihana wale nō, kahi hoaaloha maikaʻi, kumu a i ʻole kekahi hoa hana hiki ke kōkua nui e puka i waho o kēlā wahi pouli.