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“ʻAʻole ʻoe koʻu makuahine! ʻAʻohe āu mea e haʻi mai iaʻu! “ ʻO ia ka pane ʻino i ke kauoha i hāʻawi ʻia i ke keiki a kāna hoa, ke pilikia ka pilina.
Ma mua o ke keʻakeʻa ʻana i kāna hānai ʻana (ʻaʻahu papaʻaina, ʻoki lauoho, hoʻohana kelepona, wā moe, etc.), e ʻike a aloha i ke keiki. Mai noho ʻōlelo ʻole ʻia. "I kou noho ʻana ma lalo o ka hale hoʻokahi, e wehewehe mālie iā ia i nā lula no kou home. A i ʻole, e ulu aʻe ka ʻāʻī a hoʻopau koke ʻia ", wehewehe i ke keiki psychiatrist Edwige Antier.
He kuleana ko kēlā me kēia kanaka. ʻO ka ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo mai Marie-Dominique Linder, psychoanalyst *
ʻO ke kuleana o nā mākua ka waiho ʻana i nā kumu kumu: ma ka hoʻonaʻauao (alakaʻi, pilina me nā kumu, etc.), ethics (moral standards, etc.) a i ʻole olakino (koho o nā lapaʻau, etc.).
ʻO nā hūnōna, hiki iā lākou ke hāʻawi i ka hoʻohana ʻana i kēlā me kēia lā i nā lula o ke ʻano maikaʻi, e hāʻule ana ma lalo o "Ka mana kūloko" : ola olakino (ʻai, wā moe ...), haʻawina home kula (nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo, nānā ...), ʻano hana i loko o ke kaiāulu (politeness, ʻano papa ʻaina ...) E makaʻala ʻaʻole e nīnau i ka mea a kekahi makua i hoʻokomo ai iā ia.
Inā nui ka paio, e mālama ka makua mālama me kāna keiki. E ʻae kēia iā ʻoe e hoʻokuʻu.
Ke kono ʻia ka ʻOedipus complex iā ia iho
Ma kahi o 5 mau makahiki, i loko o ka puʻuwai o ka pae oedipal, ʻaʻole e kānalua ke kaikamahine liʻiliʻi e hoʻokuʻu i kona makuahōnōwai wahine. E noi ana ʻo ia iā ʻoe e haʻalele iā ia me kona makuakāne. ʻO ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, e hele mai ʻo ia e paheʻe ma waena o ʻolua ma ka sofa ...
I nā hihia koʻikoʻi, hiki i kēia ke hele i ka manipulation. ʻO Mamylavand, ma ka Infobebes.com forum, e lawe i ka pōʻino. "I mua o kona makuakāne, he nani ʻo ia. Ke hele ʻo ia, hōʻino ʻo ia iaʻu, hōʻino ʻole iaʻu, ʻaʻole hoʻolohe… Hoʻāʻo wau e kamaʻilio me koʻu hoaaloha no ia mea, akā manaʻo ʻo ia ua hoʻonui wau… ”
Akā, e ʻoluʻolu, ma ka mahalo ʻana i ke keiki a me kāna moʻolelo, e pau ana kona lili iā ʻoe. Hoʻomanawanui a hoʻomanawanui…
* Mea kākau o Recomposed Families – Practical Guide, i paʻi ʻia e Hachette Pratique