He ipu hao maoli ka'u keiki!

ʻO ka ipu kāpili pēpē mai hoʻokahi a ʻelua mau makahiki: he pono maoli i kēia makahiki

He mea maʻamau no ke keiki ke pili loa i kona makuahine a hiki i ka piha ʻana o ʻelua makahiki. Ma kahi liʻiliʻi, e loaʻa iā ia kona mana kūʻokoʻa ma kāna wikiwiki. Kākoʻo mākou iā ia i kēia loaʻa me ka wikiwiki ole iaia, no ka mea, ʻaʻole lilo kēia pono i mea nui a hiki i ka 18 mahina. Ma waena o 1 a me 3 mau makahiki, e hoʻololi ke keiki ma waena o nā manawa o ka hōʻoiaʻiʻo, kahi e hōʻike ai ʻo ia iā ia iho he "pota glue", a me nā mea ʻē aʻe o ka ʻimi ʻana i ka honua a puni iā ​​​​ia. Akā, i kēia makahiki, ʻaʻole kēia hoʻopili nui ʻana he ala e hoʻāʻo ai i nā palena i kau ʻia e kona mau mākua, ʻaʻole pili i ka makemake i ka mana o ke keiki, no ka mea ʻaʻole hiki i kona lolo. No laila he mea nui aole e paio me ia ma ka pāʻani ʻana i ka mea ʻoi aku ka ikaika a i ʻole ka hoʻohewa ʻana iā ia no ka hana ʻana. ʻOi aku ka maikaʻi e hōʻoiaʻiʻo iā ia ma ka hāʻawi ʻana iā ia i ka nānā āna e koi ai, ma ka hana ʻana i kahi hana me ia, ma ka heluhelu ʻana iā ia i nā moʻolelo ...

ʻO kahi ipu hao o ke kāpili ma 3 - 4 mau makahiki: he pono no ka palekana o loko?

ʻOiai ʻo ke keiki ʻoi aku ka ʻano hoihoi a huli i ka honua, hoʻololi ʻo ia i kāna ʻano a ʻaʻole haʻalele i kona makuahine me kahi kapu. Hahai ʻo ia iā ia ma nā wahi a pau, a uē i ka waimaka wela i kona wā e hele aku ai ... Inā hoʻopā mua ʻia kekahi e kona ʻano, hiki ke hoʻohālikelike ʻia me ke ʻano o ke aloha, lilo koke ke kūlana i mea paʻakikī ke mālama . No laila pehea e hiki ai iā mākou ke kōkua iā ia i loaʻa i nā mea a pau ke kūʻokoʻa?

I ke kumu o ka manaʻo "pot of glue", kahi hopohopo o ka kaʻawale

Nui nā kumu o ia ʻano i loko o kahi keiki. ʻO ka hoʻololi ʻana i nā pae ʻāina - no ka laʻana e hoʻomaka i ke kula ʻoiai ʻoe e hui pū ana a hiki i kēlā manawa, kahi neʻe ʻana, ka hemo ʻana, ka hiki ʻana mai o kahi pēpē i ka ʻohana… - hiki ke alakaʻi i ka hopohopo kaʻawale. ʻO kāu keiki hiki ke hana like me kēia ma hope o ka wahaheʻe. "Inā ʻoe i hilinaʻi iā ia e ʻōlelo ana e hoʻi mai ana ʻoe a loaʻa iā ia i ka lā aʻe, hopohopo paha ʻo ia e haʻalele ʻia. ʻOiai inā makemake ʻoe e pale aku i ka hopohopo iā ia, pono ʻoe e hoʻomau a maopopo e mālama i ka hilinaʻi iā ʻoe, "wahi a Lise Bartoli, ke kauka psychologist. Inā ua haʻi pinepine ʻoe iā ia he mea pōʻino ke haʻalele iā ʻoe, a i ʻole ua lohe ʻo ia i nā mea nūhou ma ka TV, hiki iā ia ke ulu i ka hopohopo. ʻO kekahi poʻe liʻiliʻi, ʻoi aku ka hopohopo ma mua o nā mea ʻē aʻe, like pinepine me ko lakou mau makua!

He noi ʻike ʻole mai nā mākua…

Inā manaʻo mākou ua haʻalele ʻia, a hopohopo paha, hiki iā mākou ke kali me ka ʻike ʻole i kekahi manawa no ke keiki e hoʻopiha i ko mākou huikau. A laila e hoʻomāʻona ʻo ia i ka makemake o kona makuahine e like me ka ʻike ʻole, hōʻole ʻole e haʻalele iā ia wale nō. Hiki ke hele mai kona ʻaoʻao "pot of glue". o ka pilikia transgenerational. Ua ʻike paha ʻoe i ka hopohopo hoʻokaʻawale iā ʻoe iho i ka makahiki like a paʻa paha i loko o kāu subconscious. Manaʻo kāu keiki, me ka ʻike ʻole i ke kumu, a hopohopo ʻo ia e haʻalele iā ʻoe. Hāʻawi ʻo Psychotherapist Isabelle Filliozat i ka laʻana o kahi makuakāne nona kāna keikikāne 3 makahiki i uē a huhū weliweli i kona haʻalele ʻana iā ia ma ke kula. Ua ʻike ka makua kāne i ka wā like, ua hoʻokuʻu kona mau mākua ponoʻī i ke kahu hānai āna i pili nui ai, me ka manaʻo he pono ʻole kona hele ʻana ma muli o kona komo ʻana i ke kula. Ua manaʻo ke keiki ua paʻakikī kona makua kāne, me ka ʻike ʻole i ka wehewehe ʻana, a ua mālama ʻo ia i ka haʻalele ʻana a ka hope i kanikau ʻole ai! No laila, ʻo ka mea mua e hana ai ʻo ia ka hoʻopau ʻana i kona hopohopo ponoʻī i ʻole e pilikia ka lawe ʻana.

E hoopau i kona mau makau

Hiki ke kōkua ka noʻonoʻo, hoʻomaha, yoga a me ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa noʻonoʻo ma o ka ʻae ʻana iā ʻoe e hoʻomaopopo i kāu hana ponoʻī a hiki iā ʻoe ke wehewehe iā ʻoe iho. “A laila hiki iā ʻoe ke ʻōlelo aku i kāu keiki: 'Ua hopohopo ʻo Māmā no ka mea… Mai hopohopo, na Māmā e mālama a ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi ma hope'. A laila e hoʻomaopopo ʻo ia he hopohopo makua hiki ke hoʻopau ʻia, "wahi a Lise Bartoli. Ma kekahi ʻaoʻao, e hōʻole i ka nīnau ʻana iā ia no ke aha ʻo ia e hahai ai iā ʻoe, a haʻalele paha iā ʻoe. Manaʻo ʻo ia i ka hewa, ke loaʻa ʻole iā ia ka pane, a ʻoi aku ka hopohopo iā ia.

E kiʻi i ke kōkua mai kahi psychologist

Inā ʻoiai nā mea āpau, mau ka hopohopo o kāu keiki a hahai ʻo ia iā ʻoe a puni, mai hoʻokaʻulua e kamaʻilio me kahi keiki psychiatrist, he psychologist ... E kōkua ʻo ia iā ʻoe e ʻike i ke kumu, e hoʻoponopono i ka pilikia. kūlana. E hōʻoluʻolu i kāu keiki me nā moʻolelo hoʻohālikelike, hoʻomaʻamaʻa ʻike… ʻO ka hope, inā e kali ana kahi hoʻololi nui iā ʻoe a hiki ke hoʻopilikia i kāna mau pae, hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻomākaukau me nā puke e pili ana i ke kumuhana.