“Ua ʻōlelo ʻo ia ma mua o 'makua'! “
“Ua noʻonoʻo wau, hoʻi i ka pule i hala! Ua kali au iā ia no hoʻokahi mahina a ʻelua paha. A hiki i ia manawa, e hana ana ʻo ia i nā leo leo liʻiliʻi, akā ma laila, ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻo ia ka "papapapa", a ua haʻi ʻia iaʻu! ʻAʻole wau i manaʻo e loaʻa iaʻu kekahi manaʻo, akā he ʻoiaʻiʻo ua ʻike wau he mea ʻoluʻolu loa iaʻu i kona huki ʻana i koʻu ʻeke a ʻōlelo ʻo “papapapa”. ʻAʻole, ʻaʻole ʻo ia i ʻōlelo mua iā mama! He mea lapuwale ia, akā ʻakaʻaka iaʻu: aia kahi hoʻokūkū liʻiliʻi ma waena o koʻu hoa me aʻu, a hauʻoli wau i ka lanakila ʻana! Pono e ʻōlelo ʻia e mālama nui wau i kaʻu keiki. ”
ʻO Bruno, ka makuakāne o Aurélien, 16 mau mahina.
“He mea oni loa. “
“ʻO kāna 'papa' mua, hoʻomanaʻo maikaʻi wau. E pāʻani ana mākou me kāna Duplos. He 9 a 10 mahina wale nō ʻo Jean: ʻōlelo ʻo ia ʻo "Papa". Pīhoihoi koʻu lohe ʻana iā ia e kamaʻilio koke a noʻu kāna ʻōlelo mua. He hana paʻa loa kaʻu wahine, no laila ke hoʻolilo nei au i ka manawa nui me kaʻu mau keiki. Ua kāhea koke au iā ia e haʻi aku iā ia i ka nūhou. Ua hauʻoli mākou a ua haʻohaʻo iki i kona ʻano mua. Ma hope mai, hana like kona kaikuahine. A me he mea lā (ʻaʻole wau hoʻomanaʻo!) ʻO wau kekahi i ʻōlelo mua loa. Pono kākou e manaʻoʻiʻo aia i loko o ka ʻohana! ”
ʻO Yannick, ʻelua mau keiki he 6 a me 3 makahiki.
“Hoʻololi mākou i ka pilina. “
Ke hoʻomanaʻo pono nei au i ka manawa mua a lāua i ʻōlelo ai he papa. Noʻu, hōʻailona maoli ia ma mua a ma hope. Ma mua, me ka pēpē, aia mākou i loko o kahi pilina ʻoi aku ka hui: lawe mākou iā ia i nā lima, i ka wā e uē ai, hana mākou i nā pūliki, honi. Nānā liʻiliʻi wau i ka "tatata, papama" mua, akā i ka puka ʻana o ka "papa" mua, ikaika loa ia. Aia ka manaʻo, aia kahi nānā e pili ana i kēlā ʻōlelo. I kēlā me kēia manawa, he mea hou. Noʻu, ʻaʻohe "pēpē" hou, aia kahi keiki, kahi kanaka makua e hiki mai ana i ka hana ʻana, me ia aʻu e komo ai i kahi pilina ʻē aʻe, ʻoi aku ka naʻauao. ”
JULES, ka makuakane o Sara, 7, a me Natana, 2.
ʻO ka manaʻo o ka mea akamai:
"He manawa koʻikoʻi loa ia i ka pilina ma waena o ke kāne a me kāna keiki. ʻOiaʻiʻo, hiki i ke kāne ke manaʻo e like me ka makua kāne mai ka manawa i hoʻolālā ai ʻo ia e loaʻa kahi keiki, akā ʻo kēia manawa i koho ʻia ke kāne e ke keiki "papa" he manawa o ka ʻike. Ma kēia huaʻōlelo, ke manaʻo nei mākou he "hanau", no ka mea, ʻo ia ka hoʻomaka ʻana o kahi paʻa hou, "ʻike", no ka mea e aʻo ke keiki a me ka makua kāne e ʻike kekahi i kekahi ma o ka huaʻōlelo, a me ka "ʻike", no ka mea ke ʻōlelo nei ke keiki i ka. kamaʻāina o kahi hālāwai: ʻo ʻoe koʻu makuakāne, ʻike wau iā ʻoe a koho wau iā ʻoe ma ke ʻano. Me kēia ʻōlelo, hoʻokumu ke keiki i kahi o ka makua kāne. Hiki ke hānau ʻia kahi pilina hou, e like me ka ʻōlelo a kekahi o nā makua kāne ʻelua. Ma keia mau hoike, olelo na kanaka i ko lakou manao i ka lohe ana i keia mau olelo. He mea nui. A hiki i kēlā manawa, ua mālama ʻia ka wahi o ka manaʻo no nā makuahine, ʻoiai he mahele i kūkulu ʻia. Ke kamaʻilio e pili ana i ko lākou mau manaʻo, ʻaʻole pale hou nā kāne iā lākou iho. ʻOi aku ka maikaʻi, no ka mea, mahalo iā lākou, ʻaʻole lākou e waiho hou iā lākou iho ma kahi mamao mai ke keiki. ”
ʻO Daniel Coum, ke kaukaʻi a me ka psychoanalyst, ka mea kākau o "Paternité", ed. o ka EHESP.