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Ke loaʻa kahi kanaka kokoke iā mākou i kahi kūlana paʻakikī: haʻalele kekahi o nā mea aloha iā ia i kona ola, ke hele nei ʻo ia i kahi maʻi koʻikoʻi a hemo paha - ʻike koke mākou i ka paʻakikī o ka loaʻa ʻana o nā huaʻōlelo kūpono. . Makemake mākou e hōʻoluʻolu, akā e hoʻonui pinepine. He aha ka mea hiki ʻole ke ʻōlelo aku i ke kanaka maʻi?
ʻO ka manawa pinepine i kēlā mau kūlana, nalowale mākou a haʻi hou i ka mea a nā poʻe ʻē aʻe e ʻōlelo ai i ke kanaka me ka ʻole o mākou: "Ke aloha nei au," "ʻawaʻawa ke lohe i kēia." E nānā i nā manaʻo ma nā pūnaewele kaiaulu ma lalo o kēlā mau pou i makemake ai ka mea kākau e kākoʻo. ʻO ka hapa nui o lākou, ʻaʻohe kānalua, ua kākau ʻia mai ka puʻuwai, akā hana hou kekahi i kekahi, a ma muli o ka hopena, kani ke kani ʻana e like me kahi moʻolelo haʻihaʻi.
ʻO nā huaʻōlelo ʻaʻole e kōkua i ke kanaka ʻeha, a i kekahi manawa hiki ke hōʻeha i kona kūlana
1. "Ua ike au i kou manao"
E ʻoiaʻiʻo kākou, ʻaʻole hiki iā kākou ke ʻike. ʻOiai ke manaʻo nei mākou ua aneane like ka ʻike, ola kēlā me kēia kanaka i kā lākou moʻolelo ma ko lākou ʻano ponoʻī.
Ma mua o mākou aia kekahi kanaka me nā ʻano noʻonoʻo ʻē aʻe, ka nānā ʻana i ke ola a me ka hiki ke kū i ke kaumaha, a ʻike ʻia kahi ʻano like ʻole e ia.
ʻOiaʻiʻo, hiki iā ʻoe ke kaʻana like i kāu ʻike, akā ʻaʻole pono ʻoe e ʻike i kāu mau ʻike me ka mea a kāu hoaaloha e ʻike nei i kēia manawa. A i ʻole, ua like ia me ka hoʻokau ʻana i nā manaʻo a me nā manaʻo o kekahi a me kahi manawa e kamaʻilio hou ai iā ia iho.
2. "Ua manaʻo ʻia ʻo ia, a pono ʻoe e ʻae"
Ma hope o kēlā "hōʻoluʻolu", e kū mai kahi nīnau i loko o ke kanaka: "No ke aha e pono ai iaʻu e hele i loko o kēia Gehena?" Hiki ke kōkua inā ʻike maopopo ʻoe he manaʻoʻiʻo kāu hoaaloha a kūlike kāu mau ʻōlelo me kāna kiʻi o ka honua. A i ʻole, hiki iā lākou ke hōʻeha i ke kūlana kūloko o ke kanaka, ʻo ia paha, i kēia manawa ke manaʻo nei i ka nalowale o ke ʻano o ke ola.
3. "Inā makemake ʻoe i kekahi mea, e kelepona mai iaʻu"
He ʻōlelo maʻamau a mākou e haʻi hou ai me ka manaʻo maikaʻi loa. Eia naʻe, heluhelu ka mea kūkākūkā ma ke ʻano he ʻano pale āu i kūkulu ai e haʻalele i kona kaumaha. E noʻonoʻo inā e kāhea aku kahi kanaka ʻeha nui iā ʻoe me kahi noi kūikawā? Inā ʻaʻole ʻo ia i makemake ma mua e ʻimi i ke kōkua, ʻaʻole hiki ke loaʻa kēia.
Akā, hāʻawi e hana i kahi mea e pono ai kahi hoaaloha. ʻO ke kūlana o ke kaumaha e luhi ana i ka psychologically a haʻalele pinepine i ka ikaika no nā hana maʻamau o ka hale. E kipa i kahi hoaaloha, hāʻawi e kuke i kahi mea, kūʻai i kahi mea, hele wāwae i ka ʻīlio. ʻAʻole ʻokoʻa kēlā mau kōkua a e kōkua ʻoi aku ma mua o kahi makana maikaʻi akā mamao e kelepona iā ʻoe.
4. "E hala no hoi keia"
ʻO kahi hōʻoluʻolu maikaʻi i ka wā e nānā ana i kahi hōʻike TV lōʻihi lōʻihi, ʻaʻole naʻe i ka manawa e haehae ʻia ai ʻoe e nā ʻike paʻakikī. ʻO kēlā ʻōlelo no ka mea e ʻeha e hoʻohaʻahaʻa loa i kona mau manaʻo. A ʻoiai ʻo kēia ʻōlelo iā ia iho he ʻoiaʻiʻo nui, he mea nui i ke kanaka ʻaʻole e wikiwiki iā ia iho, e noho i kahi kūlana kaumaha a hiki i ka hoʻomaopopo ʻana i kēia mau ʻōlelo iā ia iho, i ka manawa e mākaukau ai no ia mau ʻōlelo.
ʻO ka hoʻokō ʻana i kēia mau lula āpau e hoʻonui i ka manawa e kōkua ai i kahi mea aloha
Eia naʻe, ʻo ka mea ʻino loa āu e hana ai, ʻaʻole ia e ʻōlelo iki. Ua ʻae ka poʻe i loaʻa i ke kaumaha i ka noho ʻole ʻana o ka poʻe aloha i lilo i hoʻāʻo hou no lākou. ʻO ka mea nui paha, ʻo kekahi o ka poʻe i huki nui i ke aloha, ʻaʻole hiki iā lākou ke ʻike i nā ʻōlelo kūpono. Eia nō naʻe, i nā manawa paʻakikī a me nā manawa ʻawaʻawa o ke ola ʻo kā mākou ʻōlelo ke kākoʻo nui. E noʻonoʻo i ka poʻe i aloha iā ʻoe.
E pili ana i ka mea kākau: ʻO Andrea Bonior he kauka psychologist loea i ka mālama addiction a me kahi mea kākau puke.