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ʻO ka ʻuhane, ka noho ʻana, ka palaoa, ka mahina… ʻO kēia mau neologisms a pau ke wehewehe nei i ke ʻano o ke kamaʻilio ʻana ma nā pūnaewele pili a me nā polokalamu hoʻoheheʻe i kēia lā, a wehewehe lākou āpau i nā ʻano like ʻole o ka hōʻole. I kekahi mau hihia, hiki i kēia mau hana noʻonoʻo ke hōʻeha i kou manaʻo ponoʻī. Ke ho'āʻo nei ʻo Xenia Dyakova-Tinoku e noʻonoʻo pehea e ʻike ai iā lākou a me ka mea e hana ai inā lilo ʻoe i mea hōʻeha i kahi "kanaka ʻuhane".
ʻAʻole he mea hou ke ʻano o ka ʻuhane iā ia iho (mai ka ʻuhane Pelekania - a ghost). Ua ʻike mākou a pau i nā huaʻōlelo "haʻalele i ka ʻōlelo Pelekania" a "hoʻouna e nānā ʻole." Akā ma mua, i ka "pre-virtual era", ua ʻoi aku ka paʻakikī o ka hana ʻana i kēia, ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ka mea mahuka ma waena o nā hoaaloha a me nā hoahana. Hiki iā ʻoe ke hālāwai me ia a koi i kahi wehewehe.
Ma ka pūnaewele pūnaewele,ʻaʻohe mana o ka nohona likeʻole, aʻoi aku ka maʻalahi o ka uhakiʻana i ka pilina me kaʻikeʻoleʻia o nā hopena.
Pehea e hiki ai
Hui 'oe ma ka Internet me kekahi kanaka i maopopo hoihoi i ke kamaʻilio. Hoʻomaikaʻi ʻo ia, he nui kāu mau kumuhana maʻamau no ke kamaʻilio ʻana, malia paha ua hālāwai ʻoe "i ke ola maoli" ma mua o hoʻokahi manawa a i ʻole i ka moe kolohe. Akā i kekahi lā ho'ōki ʻo ia i ke kamaʻilio ʻana, ʻaʻole pane i kāu mau kelepona, nā leka a me nā leka. I ka manawa like, ʻike paha ʻoe ua heluhelu ʻo ia iā lākou a hāmau.
Hele ka poʻe i waho o ka radar no ka mea ʻaʻole lākou makemake e ʻike i ka pilikia o ka haʻalele ʻana me ʻoe.
Hoʻomaka ʻoe e hopohopo: ʻaʻole pono ʻoe i kahi pane? I ka pule i hala iho nei, ua hele ʻoe i nā kiʻiʻoniʻoni a kaʻana like i nā hoʻomanaʻo o ka wā kamaliʻi. Akā i kēia manawa me he mea lā ua ʻeleʻele ʻoe. No ke aha mai? He aha ke kumu? He aha kāu i hana hewa ai? Ua hoʻomaka maikaʻi nā mea a pau…
"Holo ka poʻe mai kāu radar no hoʻokahi kumu: ʻaʻole lākou makemake e hōʻeha i ka naʻau e wehewehe ana i ke kumu ʻaʻole pili hou kāu pilina," wahi a Janice Wilhauer. — Noho ʻoe i ke kūlanakauhale nui. He mea liʻiliʻi ka manaʻo o kahi hālāwai manawa, a hauʻoli loa ka "kanaka ʻuhane" i kēia. Eia kekahi, ʻo ka pinepine o ka hoʻopau ʻana i ke kamaʻilio ʻana ma kēia ʻano, ʻoi aku ka maʻalahi iā ia e pāʻani i ka "hamu".
Hoʻonāwaliwali nā ʻano hana hoʻohiwahiwa passive-agressive. Hoʻokumu ia i kahi manaʻo o ka maopopo ʻole a me ka ambiguity. Me he mea lā ʻaʻole ʻoe i mahalo ʻia, ua hōʻole ʻia ʻoe, akā ʻaʻole maopopo ʻoe i kēia. Pono au e hopohopo? He aha inā i loaʻa kekahi mea i kāu hoaaloha a i ʻole ʻo ia i hana a hiki ke kelepona i kēlā me kēia manawa?
Ua ʻōlelo ʻo Janice Wilhauer, ʻo ka hōʻole ʻana i ka nohona e hoʻāla i nā kikowaena ʻeha like i ka lolo e like me ka ʻeha kino. No laila, i ka manawa koʻikoʻi, hiki ke kōkua i kahi mea hōʻeha ʻeha ma muli o ka paracetamol. Akā ma kahi o kēia pili olaola ma waena o ka hōʻole ʻana a me ka ʻeha, ʻike ʻo ia i kekahi mau kumu ʻē aʻe e hoʻonui ai i ko mākou pilikia.
He mea nui ka launa mau ʻana me nā poʻe ʻē aʻe no ke ola ʻana, ua hoʻomohala ʻia kēia ʻano hana evolutionary i nā tausani makahiki. Kōkua nā loina pilikanaka iā mākou e hoʻololi i nā kūlana like ʻole. Eia naʻe, hoʻonele ka ʻuhane i nā alakaʻi: ʻaʻohe ala e hōʻike ai i ko mākou mau manaʻo i ka mea lawehala. I kekahi manawa, me he mea lā e nalowale ana ka mana o ko mākou ola ponoʻī.
Pehea e hana ai
I ka hoʻomaka ʻana, ʻōlelo ʻo Jennis Wilhauer i ka lawe ʻole ʻia ʻana ua lilo ka hoʻokipa virtual i ala ʻae ʻia e kamaʻilio me ke kamaʻilio ʻole. ʻO ka ʻike maoli e kū nei ʻoe me ka ghosting e kōkua i ka wehe ʻana i ke kaumaha o ka hopohopo mai ka ʻuhane. "He mea nui e hoʻomaopopo ʻo ka ʻike ʻole ʻia ʻana ʻaʻole ʻoe e ʻōlelo i kekahi mea e pili ana iā ʻoe a me kou mau ʻano. He hōʻailona wale nō kēia ʻaʻole mākaukau kāu hoaaloha a ʻaʻole hiki ke loaʻa i kahi pilina olakino a makua, "wahi a Jennis Wilhauer.
Makaʻu ka "Ghost" e alo i kona mau manaʻo ponoʻī a me kou mau manaʻo, ua hoʻonele ʻia i ka empathy, a i ʻole nalo me ka nalo no kekahi manawa i mea e huki ai i ka nānā ʻana i nā kuʻuna maikaʻi loa o ka pick-up. No laila, pono anei kēia makaʻu a manipulator i kou waimaka?