ʻAukake. Pō. Hale hale papa. Kū ke kaikamahine ma ka lanai ma lalo o ka hale a puhi. Aia wau i lalo, ma ka puka komo, nānā i luna a ʻakaʻaka. No kekahi kumu, loaʻa iaʻu kahi kukui uila i loko o kaʻu ʻeke. Huli au, kākau wau me nā leka māmā i ka lewa ʻeleʻele: "Aloha wau iā ʻoe." He mākau kamaʻilio ʻo Courtship, ʻo ia ka hiki ke unuhi a heluhelu i nā hōʻailona, a i kēia lā e pili pū ana i ka ʻike ʻana i ke kani ʻana o nā emoticons, SMS punctuation a me ke kamaʻilio hoʻomaha. He aha nā loli i ka hoʻomaka ʻana o kahi pilina?
Manaʻo ka hapa nui o koʻu mau hoaaloha e neʻe ana ke kamaʻilio i ka Pūnaewele.
"Ua ʻimi ʻo ia i nā hālāwai maoli, ʻoki i kāna kelepona home, hālāwai me kona makuahine! Ke hoʻomau nei ka huhū ma muli o ka hana "mai hope o ka nahele" ma ke ʻano o nā ʻoihana pūnaewele ... ”- wahi a Yulia, 26 makahiki.
"ʻO nā pūnaewele kaiaulu, ka hoʻokuʻu ʻana i nā mea pili i ka wahine ua hana i kā lākou hana," wahi a Dmitry, 35 makahiki. "Eia kekahi, he nui nā kaiāulu o nā makemake (sexual)."
Ma muli paha o ka maʻalahi o ka hoʻopili ʻana a me ka hoʻopunipuni o ke koho ʻana, ua wikiwiki nā pilina: neʻe koke lākou i ka moekolohe a hoʻopau e like me ka wikiwiki.
"Ua ʻoi aku ka lohi a me ke aloha," wahi a Nastya, 34 makahiki, "i kēia manawa ua like ia me kahi mākeke: hui mākou, makemake a kāhea koke i ka home. Ma mua, hāʻawi lākou i nā pua, i kēia manawa ke ho'āʻo nei lākou e hāʻawi ʻole i kekahi mea, no ka mea he nui nā kaikamahine e ʻae i nā mea hou aʻe i ka manawa hoʻokahi.
Wahi a nā ʻike a Natalya, 42 makahiki, "ʻeono mahina ma mua o ka moe ʻana i kēia manawa he mea lapuwale, kokoke i ka nani."
Ma nā mea a pau e pili ana i ka hoʻopalau, ʻike mākou i ka nānā ʻana i ka hopena, ʻaʻole ke kaʻina hana. "He wikiwiki loa nā kāne e hōʻike i ko lākou makemake i kahi pilina a me ka hana e like me ia," wahi a Olga, 29 makahiki. "Ma mua, hiki iā lākou ke hoʻokolokolo me ka maopopo ʻole no nā makahiki a loaʻa nā kamaʻilio abstract."
No kekahi, ʻo ka hoʻouna ʻana i kahi kiʻi pili e like me ka hāʻawi ʻana i kahi pahu kokoleka, kahi makana ʻike ʻole, kahi hōʻailona o ka nānā.
ʻO kahi kumuhana ʻokoʻa ʻo ia nā polokalamu pili. Ma laila, kau ʻia ke kamaʻilio a me nā hālāwai. "Manaʻo ʻoe he huahana āu e koho ai a koho iā ʻoe iho, - wahi a Svetlana, 32 makahiki. "ʻAʻohe wahi no ka hoʻokamakama."
Ua komo nā smartphones ma lalo o nā pālule a me nā pālule, ʻo ka hoʻouna ʻana i nā kiʻi pili i lilo i mea maʻamau. "He ʻakaʻaka nā ʻakaʻaka, akā ʻo kaʻu kelepona paʻa ke mālama nei i nā ʻaoʻao a pau o ka honua," i ʻōlelo ai ʻo Tanya, 28 makahiki. "No kekahi, ʻo ka hoʻouna ʻana i kahi kiʻi pili e like me ka hāʻawi ʻana i kahi pahu kokoleka, kahi makana makaʻu ʻole, kahi hōʻailona o ka nānā."
Ke neʻe nei nā kuleana kāne, ke alakaʻi nei nā wahine. "I kēia manawa hiki i kahi wahine ke kelepona i kahi a uku i ka bila, no ka mea makemake ʻo ia," wahi a Svetlana, 32 makahiki. No Maria, he 26 makahiki, hilinaʻi nā mea a pau i ka ikaika o ka hoihoi: “Naʻu e koho, ʻaʻole naʻu. Ke koho, hoʻowalewale au, inā ʻaʻole hoʻopunipuni ka mea, hoʻololi wau i nā mea ʻē aʻe.
"I loko o ka wā hoʻopalau, ʻaʻole maopopo nā mea ʻelua i kekahi i kekahi, akā ke hoʻāʻo nei kēlā me kēia e lanakila i kekahi," i kākau ai ʻo psychologist Erich Fromm. — Ua piha nā mea ʻelua i ke ola, nani, hoihoi, nani hoʻi - ʻo ka hauʻoli o ke ola e hoʻonani mau ai ka helehelena. ʻAʻole loaʻa iā lāua kekahi i kekahi; No laila, ʻo ka ikaika o kēlā me kēia o lākou ke manaʻo nei i ke ʻano, ʻo ia hoʻi, ka hāʻawi ʻana i kekahi a me ka hoʻoulu ʻana iā ia.1.
Hoʻopau ʻia ka pili ʻana i kekahi i kekahi a i ʻole hoʻomau i ke aloha. Aia ke kukui uila ma kēlā me kēia kelepona paʻalima. ʻoluʻolu loa.
1 E. Fromm «E loaʻa a e lilo paha» (Neoclassic, 2015).