10 mau huaʻōlelo pepehi kanaka no ka male ʻana

ʻOiaʻiʻo, pono e hoʻokaʻawale i waena o ka mea i ʻōlelo ʻia a me ka mea i ʻōlelo ʻole ʻia. Akā me kēia mau ʻōlelo he ʻumi, pono ʻoe e makaʻala loa.

1. ʻAʻole ʻoe e holoi kīʻaha. Ua lilo lākou i mea hoʻonohonoho. "

ʻO ka mua, ka leo kani. Hoʻopiʻi implies defense, attack — pale. Manaʻo ʻoe i ka dynamic? Ua like ʻoe me ka mea hoʻokani pahu i hoʻonohonoho i ka wikiwiki no ke mele holoʻokoʻa i ka hoʻomaka. Eia hou, e poina ʻia nā papa, a makemake ʻoe e kūkākūkā i nā kumuhana ʻē aʻe, a e mau nō ke ʻano o kāu kamaʻilio ʻana: "Hoʻouka wau, pale!"

ʻO ka lua, ʻaʻole pono e kani ka huaʻōlelo "ʻaʻole loa" i kāu mau kamaʻilio ʻana, e like me ka "mau", "ma ka laulā" a me "ʻoe mau loa", wahi a psychologist Samantha Rodman.

2. "He makua kāne ʻino ʻoe/ipo ʻino"

He paʻakikī ke poina ia mau ʻōlelo. No ke aha mai? Ua hoʻokokoke loa mākou i nā kuleana a ka hoa pili e ʻike ai he kanaka. He mea koʻikoʻi kēia mau kuleana no ke kāne, a ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi ʻaʻole e nīnau iā lākou.

Aia kekahi ala ʻē aʻe - hiki iā ʻoe ke ʻōlelo, no ka laʻana: "Ua kūʻai au i nā tiketi kiʻiʻoniʻoni, makemake kā mākou mau kaikamahine e nānā i nā kiʻiʻoniʻoni hou me ʻoe," wahi a ka psychotherapist Gary Newman.

3. "Ua like kou leo ​​me kou makuahine"

Ke komo nei ʻoe i ka ʻāina ʻaʻole iā ʻoe. "Kakahiaka, ka lā, ka makuahine bakes pies ..." - he kiʻi lā. Hiki ke kani ia huaʻōlelo i hoʻokahi hihia - inā ʻōlelo ʻia me ka leo mahalo. A me he mea lā ua haʻalele pū mākou i ke kumuhana o ke kamaʻilio ʻana, i hoʻomanaʻo ai ʻo Sharon O'Neill, he mea lapaʻau ʻohana.

ʻO ʻoe wale nō i kēia manawa. E hoʻomanaʻo i kou makemake i kēia ma ka hoʻomaka ʻana o kāu kamaʻāina - e noho hoʻokahi wale nō, a i ʻole hiki i kekahi ke keʻakeʻa. No laila, no ke aha e hana ai i mea nui loa kāu kamaʻilio ʻana?

4. "Ke inaina nei au ke hana oe pela" (i olelo leo nui aku imua o kona mau hoaaloha a ohana paha)

ʻAe, he hōʻole loa kēlā i ka male. E hoʻomanaʻo, mai hana i kēlā, wahi a Becky Whetstone, he mea lapaʻau ʻohana.

Pela ke ano o na kane. E haʻi i ka ʻōlelo like ma kahi huna, a e hoʻolohe mai kāu hoa iā ia me ka mālie. ʻAʻole ka manaʻo i loko o ka huaʻōlelo ponoʻī, akā i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo e haʻi aku ʻoe i kou inaina i mua o ka poʻe i manaʻo iā ʻoe he ʻano hoʻokahi a ʻo ko lākou manaʻo he mea nui loa i ke kanaka.

5. "Manaʻo ʻoe ʻo ʻoe ka maikaʻi?"

ʻElua pānaʻi ʻawaʻawa i hoʻokahi ʻōlelo. Ke kānalua nei ʻoe i ka waiwai o kahi hoa a "heluhelu" i nā manaʻo i loko o kona poʻo, wehewehe ʻo Becky Whetstone. A manaʻo wau he mea hoʻomāʻewaʻewa?

6. "Mai kali oe ia'u"

Ma keʻano laulā, he ʻōlelo ʻino ʻole, akā ʻaʻole pono e ʻōlelo pinepine ʻia ma mua o ka moe. Mai haʻalele i kāu hoa e hoʻokaʻawale i nā minuke ahiahi i ka hui o ka poʻe e ʻike i ka manawa a me nā ʻōlelo leʻaleʻa nona - pono ʻoe e wehe i kahi pona ...

7. "Ke hoʻomaikaʻi nei ʻoe?"

ʻAʻole kēia he hoʻohewa kūkulu. A ʻo ka hoʻohewa ʻana i loko o ka pilina e pono ke kūkulu, hoʻomanaʻo iā Becky Whetstone. No ke kanaka, ʻoluʻolu ʻole kēia, no ka mea, ke kū nei ʻo ia i mua o ke aniani, ʻoluʻolu loa iā ia iho.

8. "ʻAʻole pono ʻoe e noʻonoʻo pēlā"

ʻAʻole pono ʻoe e hana i nā mea āu e ʻike ʻole ai. ʻAʻohe mea hoʻohaʻahaʻa i ke kāne. E ho'āʻo e hoʻomaopopo iā ia a nīnau paha i ke kumu o kona huhū, akā, mai ʻōlelo wale ʻoe "ʻaʻole ʻoe e huhū," wahi a Samantha Rodman.

9. "Aole au i ike ia ia - hana wale makou"

ʻO ka mea mua, mai hana i nā kumu! ʻO ka lua, ʻike ʻoe ʻaʻole ʻoiaʻiʻo kēia a makemake ʻoe iā ia. I loko o nā makahiki o ka male ʻana, e ulu mai ana ke aloha no kekahi o kāu mau hoa hana - no ʻoe a no kāu kāne.

ʻO ka koho maikaʻi loa ʻo ka ʻōlelo ʻana, "ʻAe, he ʻakaʻaka ia, akā makemake wau i ka luna kūʻai hou. Ke hoʻomaka ʻo ia i ka ʻakaʻaka, hoʻomanaʻo mai ʻo ia iaʻu iā ʻoe a me kou ʻano hoʻohaʻahaʻa, "wahi a ke kumu aʻo wahine ʻo Robin Wolgast. ʻO ka weheʻana, ma mua o ka noho mālie ma nā kumuhana hōʻoluʻolu,ʻo ia keʻano maikaʻi loa i ka pilina.

10. "Manaʻo ʻoe ua ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi?"

ʻO kekahi o nā nīnau ʻē aʻe i ka papa inoa lōʻihi o nā mea male male i ʻōlelo ʻia e Robin Wolgast. He aha kāu makemake e ʻōlelo ai? “Ua ʻike au ua loaʻa iaʻu ke kaumaha. ʻAʻole hauʻoli wau a makemake wau e haʻi mai ʻoe iaʻu ua maikaʻi wau a ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o koʻu nānā ʻana. Akā, ke ʻike nei au ʻaʻole ʻoiaʻiʻo.

ʻAʻole ia i loko o ka mana o kēlā me kēia kanaka, ʻo ia hoʻi, ua lilo ʻoe i kuleana no kona pono ponoʻī. Eia kekahi, ʻo kahi nīnau like, inā e hana hou ʻia i nā manawa he nui, e lilo ia i ʻōlelo no kahi hoa. A e ʻae ʻo ia iā ʻoe.

Akā inā laki ʻoe me kāu hoa, e loaʻa iā ʻoe kahi pane maʻalahi i kēlā me kēia nīnau: "ʻAe, aia ʻoe me aʻu, e ka luahine, ma nā wahi ʻē aʻe!"