ʻO Marla Joe Fisher kahi makuahine hoʻokahi, ka mea kākau moʻolelo a me ka hana. Inā ʻole, pehea ia e hānai ai i ʻelua mau keiki ponoʻī a ʻelua hoʻi? Ua hoʻoholo ʻo ia e kaʻana like i kāna mau mea i ʻike ai: he aha ka hopena o ke kanaka ke lilo ʻo ia i makua. A ʻo ia, no ka laʻana, he hipster kaila.
Ke hoʻoholo ka poʻe i kahi keiki, ʻaʻole lākou e noʻonoʻo e pili ana i kēlā. Manaʻo lākou e pili ana i ke kālā, ka hana, pehea e loli ai ka manawa leʻaleʻa hui, nā hoʻolālā hoʻomaha. Akā i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, pono ʻoe e noʻonoʻo e pili ana i kahi mea ʻē aʻe. ʻO kēlā makua he "kāne maikaʻi ʻole ia." Inā ʻoe he hipster holomua i kēia manawa, ua hala kēia. A me ka wikiwiki loa.
A he aha ka mea e hana ʻia iā ʻoe: hoʻomaka ʻoe e hana i nā yoga no nā wahine hāpai a komo i nā lole ʻoluʻolu. Inā he makuakāne ʻoe, a laila ʻo kāu hana e ulu i kahi ʻumiʻumi a haʻi i kāu wahine i kēlā me kēia lā ʻaʻole momona ʻo ia.
A laila e hāʻawi aku kāu mau hoaaloha iā ʻoe i kahi ʻauʻau pēpē hipster a me 138 lole hoʻoluʻu nani me nā lole ʻili no nā pēpē, kahi e ulu ai kāu keiki i nā lā ʻeiwa. ʻAʻohe mea e hāʻawi iā ʻoe i kahi kaʻa a i ʻole ka hoʻolako ʻana o nā pale pale i hoʻokahi makahiki, ʻaʻole. ʻAe ke Akua, inā loaʻa iā ʻoe kahi kāleka makana ma ka hale kūʻai keiki.
A laila e hele nā mea āpau e inu martini a me "mimosa", a e waiho wale ʻia ʻoe me ke keiki a me nā lole.
Manaʻo ʻoe hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻomau i ke alakaʻi ʻana i kou nohona hipster, e hoʻomaha a maʻalahi ʻoe, me kahi mea liʻiliʻi e like me ka ʻīlio a Paris Hilton i kou mau lima? Hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻāʻo. Aia kekahi maʻa maʻamau ʻo Hipster Plus maʻa. He $ 170 wale nō ke kumu kūʻai a ʻae iā ʻoe e lawe i kāu pēpē i nā ʻano kūlana like ʻole a hoʻohālike he mea pono pono ʻole ia. A hiki iā ʻoe ke ʻaʻahu i ke keiki i nā lole mai Ralph Lauren. Mai poina wale i ka hopu i ka ʻaihue. No ka uhi ʻana inā pono ʻoe e hānai i ka pēpē i ka lehulehu.
E luhi hoʻi ʻoe a luhi hoʻi i ka hiamoe ʻole, pono ʻoe e lohi i nā manawa āpau a ʻimi no kahi e noho ai, no ka mea ua hū ke keiki i ka waimaka, luaʻi a i ʻole pee, akā hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻohālikelike ʻaʻole kou ola. loli.
Akā a laila e ho'ōki ke keiki i ka noho ʻana i ka moe moe mai Ralph Lauren a hoʻomaka ʻo ia e holoholo a puni ka hale ʻaina, e kīkēkē ana i nā martini a nā kānaka a me nā “mimosa”. Ua pena ʻia kou keʻena e noho ana i nā waihoʻoluʻu kai hōʻoluʻolu me ka plastic o nā kala āpau. ʻAʻole e like kāu kīleo keʻokeʻo: e pīpī lākou a pīpī ma luna o ia ʻekolu tausani ʻelua haneli a me kanaiwa manawa.
A laila ʻike koke ʻoe iā ʻoe iho e kuke ana i ka ʻaina ahiahi, no ka mea, pilikia loa ka hele ʻana i kahi wahi. A ʻae, kuke ʻoe i kekahi ʻano ʻōpala mai nā huahana semi-finished, no ka mea ua luhi ʻoe i ka paʻa ʻana i ka pahi a i ʻole ke kū ʻana ma luna o ke kapuahi me ka hiamoe ʻole.
Lilo kahi ʻauʻau wela wela i moemoeā. Hoʻomaka ʻoe e hoʻomana i kāu kīwī, no ka mea, hoʻohuli nā kiʻi paʻi kiʻi i kāu keiki makamae mai iā ʻoe iho a hāʻawi iā ʻoe i kahi hoʻomaha. ʻAe, nānā ʻo ia i ka pahu ma mua o kāna pono, akā ʻaʻole ʻoe e noʻonoʻo.
ʻAe, ʻaʻole maikaʻi kēia.
Akā ʻo ka loli nui i kou kūlana ka haʻalele ʻana i kāu kaʻa maikaʻi. Ma ka hoʻihoʻi, e kūʻai ʻoe i kahi hāmeʻa e ʻuwā wale ana, "ʻAʻohe manaʻolana hou aʻe." ʻAe, ke kamaʻilio nei wau e pili ana i kahi minivan. A i ʻole kaʻa kaʻa kū. ʻO Minibus, malia paha. Kūpono (he huaʻōlelo hōʻino kēia), ʻoluʻolu, kaʻa ʻohana ākea.
Hoʻāʻo kekahi e hoʻopunipuni i ka hopena ma ke kūʻai ʻana i nā jeep ma kahi o nā minivans. E like me, no laila ʻaʻole e ʻike kekahi ʻaʻole ʻoe kahi hoa aloha. Ha. ʻAe, he ipu pelu kou a me kahi lako o nā holoi holoi i loko o kāu pahu, a me kahi noho kaʻa ma ka noho hope. ʻO kahi kaʻa kaʻa ma kahi o kahi kayak a paikikala paha. ʻO wai kou makemake e hoʻopunipuni? Kūʻai i kahi minivan, ʻoi aku ka ʻoiaʻiʻo.
ʻĀ, kū hoʻi ʻoe i ke kau ʻana i nā hui a me ka hulahula ʻana. Ma hope o nā mea āpau, pono ʻoe e ala ala e ʻohiʻohi iā Tanya i ka papa mālaaʻo. I ke kula. A ʻoiai, inā ʻaʻole ʻoe e pono hou e hana i kēia mau mea āpau, e ala ʻoe i ka wanaʻao - kahi maʻamau, maopopo iā ʻoe. Makemake au e hiamoe wawe. A ʻaʻole makemake wau e hulahula.
"Auhea oe?" - ua kākau kaʻu mau keiki ʻōpio iaʻu me ka huhū. "Ua lohi a ʻaʻole ʻoe i ka home."
Ma ke aumoe ka uaki. Ua ʻaʻa wau e noho me nā hoaaloha, a pīhoihoi nā keiki - ʻaʻole i hana ʻia kēia ma mua.
Ke hakakā nei wau me aʻu iho. ʻAʻole wau e ʻae iaʻu e komo i loko o kaʻu pajama ma mua o 9 pm. Ua makua nā keiki, a ke kali nei nō wau i ka manawa e hōʻoki ai wau i ka makua, hauʻoli a hoʻomaka i ka noho wale no kaʻu makemake iho. Akā ʻaʻole ia e like.
Eia naʻe, e haʻi wau iā Elena Malysheva: "ʻO kēia ka maʻamau!"