Hiki i nā mea a pau ke inoa i kāna mau ʻano "ʻino" i makemake ʻia e mālama. Ke manaʻoʻiʻo nei kā mākou columnist psychotherapist Ilya Latypov e ʻike mau ana nā poʻe ʻē aʻe iā mākou maoli. A ʻae lākou iā mākou no ko mākou ʻano.
ʻElua mau mea koʻikoʻi i ko mākou manaʻo i ka maikaʻi o nā poʻe ʻē aʻe e "heluhelu" iā mākou. ʻO kekahi ka manaʻo ua maopopo loa mākou, permeable, ʻaʻole hiki iā mākou ke hūnā i kekahi mea. ʻOi aku ka ikaika o kēia manaʻo o ka ʻike maopopo i ka wā e ʻike ai i ka hilahila a i ʻole kona ʻano māmā, hilahila - ʻo ia kekahi o nā hiʻohiʻona o ka hilahila.
Akā, aia kekahi mea koʻikoʻi, pili i ka mea mua, ka manaʻo e hiki iā mākou ke hūnā mai nā poʻe ʻē aʻe i ka mea a mākou e makaʻu ai a hilahila paha e hōʻike. Puka mai kou ʻōpū? E huki pono mākou iā ia a e hele mau mākou e like me ia - ʻaʻohe mea e ʻike.
He kīnā ʻole? E nānā pono mākou i kā mākou diction - a e hoʻoponopono nā mea a pau. Ke haʻalulu nei kou leo ke hopohopo ʻoe? «Excessively» reddening o ka maka? ʻAʻole maikaʻi ka haʻi ʻōlelo? ʻO nā hana ʻino? Hiki ke hūnā ʻia kēia mau mea a pau, no ka mea, ʻo ka poʻe a puni mākou, e ʻike ana i kēia, e haʻalele maoli lākou iā mākou.
He mea paʻakikī ke manaʻoʻiʻo ua hana maikaʻi nā poʻe ʻē aʻe iā mākou, e ʻike ana i nā hiʻohiʻona he nui.
Ma waho aʻe o ke kino kīnā, aia kekahi mau ʻano pilikino. Hiki iā ʻoe ke hilahila iā lākou a me ka hoʻokaʻawale ʻana, me ka manaʻo e hiki iā mākou ke hoʻolilo iā lākou i ʻike ʻole ʻia.
ʻO ka manaʻoʻiʻo a i ʻole ka stinginess, ʻike ʻole ʻia (ʻoiai inā he mea nui ka objectivity iā mākou - a laila e hūnā pono mākou i ka ʻaoʻao), kamaʻilio, impulsiveness (he mea hilahila kēia inā mākou e mahalo i ka hoʻopaʻa ʻana) - a pēlā aku, hiki i kēlā me kēia o mākou ke inoa i kekahi. o ko kakou mau hiohiona «ino» a makou e hoao nei e hoomalu.
Akā ʻaʻohe mea e hana. Ua like ia me ka huki ʻana i kou ʻōpū: hoʻomanaʻo ʻoe no kekahi mau minuke, a laila hoʻololi kou manaʻo, a - ʻo ka weliweli - ʻike ʻoe iā ia i kahi kiʻi maʻamau. A ua ʻike kēia wahine uʻi iā ia - a hoʻopaʻa mau me ʻoe!
He mea paʻakikī ke manaʻoʻiʻo ua hana maikaʻi nā poʻe ʻē aʻe iā mākou, e ʻike ana i ka nui o kā mākou mau hiʻohiʻona a mākou e makemake ai e hūnā. Me he mea lā ua noho lākou me mākou no ka mea hiki iā mākou ke hoʻomalu iā mākou iho - akā ʻaʻole pēlā. ʻAe, ʻaʻole maopopo mākou, akā ʻaʻole hiki ʻole mākou.
ʻO ko mākou ʻano, e like me ia, ke huki ʻia nei ma hope o nā kaola āpau i kūkulu ʻia no ia.
ʻO ko mākou manaʻo i ke ʻano o mākou no nā poʻe ʻē aʻe, pehea lākou e ʻike ai iā mākou, a me ka ʻike maoli ʻana o kekahi iā mākou, he mau kiʻi like ʻole. Akā hāʻawi ʻia ka ʻike o kēia ʻokoʻa iā mākou me ka paʻakikī.
I kekahi manawa - ke ʻike nei iā mākou iho ma ke wikiō a i ʻole ka lohe ʻana i ko mākou leo ponoʻī i kahi hoʻopaʻa leo - ʻike mākou i ka dissonance i ʻike ʻia ma waena o ko mākou ʻike a lohe ʻana iā mākou iho - a pehea mākou no nā poʻe ʻē aʻe. Akā me kēia iā mākou - e like me ka wikiō - e kamaʻilio ai kekahi.
ʻO kahi laʻana, me he mea lā iaʻu he mālie i waho a me ka pilikia ʻole, akā ke nānā ʻia mai ka ʻaoʻao, ʻike wau i kahi kanaka hopohopo a hoʻomaha ʻole. ʻIke a ʻike kā mākou poʻe aloha i kēia - a ke noho nei mākou i "ko mākou".
ʻO ko mākou ʻano, e like me ia ma mua, wehe ʻia ma hope o nā grids a pau i kūkulu ʻia no ia, a me ia e hana ai ko mākou mau hoaaloha a me nā ʻohana. A ʻo ka mea kupanaha, ʻaʻole lākou e hoʻopuehu me ka weliweli.